Inside the HEART & BRUSH

[the PHILOSOPHY]

You may know of a Doctor or Lawyer who provide “pro bono” services, but have you ever heard of an Artist who paints for FREE?  Well, that’s my philosophy!

[the HEART]

I am most inspired when I’m inspired.  Shocking, I know.  Personally, there is nothing more depressing than committing to a piece of art that lives in someone else’s imagination.  If I can’t “see it” and “feel it” with my mind’s eye, then I don’t want to do it!  Flaky as it may be, I am motivated by my emotions.  I want to devote myself to peaceful contemplation, turning off all the noise…the things I want, the things others expect from me, the pressure I put on myself.  Doing this provides me with entrance to a new expression…the variety of a singular focus. one purpose. one someone. one master. pumping life into my heart.

Basically, I have discovered that I must provide my services for FREE.

However, this doesn’t mean that others can take advantage of me.  Nor should anyone submit their name for there is no list. It actually just means that I will ask God who is on His mind and what He wants to say.  Then I will paint.  Then I will give.  No strings attached.  

With each piece I give away, the sad feeling is quickly replaced by the honor and blessing that it is to give. Because there is a personal message in each painting, I have the best job in the world: to give gifts to others that will be a reminder on their walls that they are loved.

[the BRUSH]

It all started one day when a young girl’s pencil showed a glowing inclination towards the artistic. Others began to see and be inspired by her talent, asking her to create their ideas for them. She did, and she made money. Although proud, she felt incomplete, like there was something more she wanted to do with her gift.  One day, another request for a very specifically oriented painting was commissioned. Again, she made the painting. This time, however, the piece was rejected.  She didn’t want them to feel obligated to pay her, but she had done the work.  Empty, with the painting still in her hands…and now the relationship was strained.

She longed to find inspiration again, but she would struggle.  This time, she decided that meant going to Art College.  Her father is not in favor; however, caring too much about her physical needs to allow her to “starve in the alley” as he perceived often happens to artists.  She struggled for years to understand that didn’t mean he didn’t believe she could make it.  He was just trying to take care of her the best he knew how.

Years go by with little- to no- painting. What she does paint is gifted to others.  She feels somewhat appreciated but mostly uninspired and depressed.  Other talents move in like storms, and she throws herself into writing music and plays, which draw out a new type of creativity and purpose that she once dreampt of having.

On the day her grandmother died, she finished a painting that had waited for years.  It was a symbolic painting of herself, and the beginning of a new season.  Although her grandma had died, it felt as though fresh life had been breathed into her, unexplainable, and beautiful.

Shortly after that time, she was at her brother-in-law’s house. She was visiting, sipping coffee and eating dessert when it hit her.  She was overcome by  inspiration–and told them that she MUST make a painting for that bare spot over their mantel!  One condition…she could not would not do it for money. That way there would be no sadness if it were rejected, they would only give it back, and she would try it somewhere else.

Well, that painting was finished only a few days ago, and here I am…building a philosophy around that amazing feeling you get when your gift touches someone else’s heart.

[the CANVAS]

So there it is.

Surrender is  good; vulnerability beautiful.  Emotions too, can be poured out like paint.

“The purposes of a person’s heart are deep waters,
but one who has insight draws them out.”
[Prov. 20:5]

Sept 2013 iphone 709

misty.bedwell

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26 thoughts on “Inside the HEART & BRUSH

  1. userdand says:

    I left this comment just recently on Dellightful Oak:
    http://delightfuloak.wordpress.com/2013/12/02/just-me-and-my-drum/#comments

    “When we have abundance, we mistakenly feel possessing the abundance is our blessing. All the while, the blessing is in that we have an abundance to share, to give away without feeling loss or need, but with joy through a charitable and serving spirit.”

    Out of your abundance of artistic talent, you are giving. The gift will not be the painting. The canvas is only a medium to display the gift. The gift will be the unmet need of another that God places upon your heart to meet as only you can. You may not even be aware of the “what” of “why” of your creation, merely following a diving leading. When it is received, it will be perfect as no other gift could.

    I would hope you are soon inspired to portray the emotion of a special person in your life who has chosen to overcome illness even if it means daily pain and suffering so she can live to complete and unfinished ministry. Just a thought.

    God bless you with abundance to that this ministry may meet the needs of others.

  2. Wow I love your site. We showcase the arts free on http://www.wepoetsshowit.com if you ever want to showcase your work, we’d be happy to do so. 🙂

  3. Do you have an email address I could contact you at?

  4. Trent Lewin says:

    Wow, that’s quite amazing. Thought I’d pop over after your latest comments… much respect.

  5. firecook says:

    I wanted to say thank you for liking a post. Also This is a real cool thought for a blog:) Good luck..

  6. Love your art and I understand your heart. Your homepage badge (gravatar) is awesome. My passion is writing and so far I have not been paid – ever – for writing, except for an employer. That doesn’t mean I can’t write or that I don’t occasionally share something valuable, or that my passion for writing is misguided. 🙂 I’ve loved writing since I was 10 years old, but am just now realizing it.

    • feelingpaint says:

      well then it seems appropriate to cheer with you for your new-found passion! Thank you for taking the time to stop by and comment. I find it interesting how the passions of our childhood may grow up, but they are always still a part of who we are! Hope you plan to keep writing 🙂

  7. tiffanniiii says:

    This is truly beautiful.

  8. tiffanniiii says:

    Hello!(:

    I have nominated this blog for the Liebster Award for bloggers. But, you need to also further nominate your fav blogs. Read about rules here:
    http://tiffanniiii.wordpress.com/2014/03/08/we-are-nominated/

    And keep updating the blog…(:

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