“Consuming”

Consuming, by Misty Bedwell, feeling paint

This painting was an 18-month-long process that took on many different colours and sizes after the flicker of inspiration first gripped me.  Had I known it would need so much time and uncertainty to become fully alive, I probably would have asked myself different questions along the way.

However, “not knowing” caused me to learn more about these things:

  • I don’t have to know what it is going to look like before I start.
  • The first time likely isn’t going to be the best time.
  • Unfinished is beautiful too.
  • Mistakes are opportunities to be creative.

I have felt so thankful for those who have displayed copious amounts of patience with my process (longest painting EVER!)  In this case, time was a necessary key to inspiration.  If I were brave, I would show you all the “FAILed” prior attempts, but I hesitate simply because I cannot yet describe WHY they didn’t meet the expression I was looking for.  It is the indescribable knowing that it’s not right that draws me back to the drawing board time and again, not with discouragement (as some would suppose), but with time-taught determination.

“Because the Sovereign LORD helps me, I will not be disgraced. Therefore, I have set my face like a stone, determined to do his will. And I know that I will not be put to shame.”

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8 thoughts on ““Consuming”

  1. beautiful….as always. Hope all is well with you and yours. xx

  2. I also have missed our chats. I’ve not blogged for a while because I’ve been ill (bowel cancer). My year has consisted of hospitals, operations, depression and all that ‘c’ evokes. All appears well at the moment though, meaning I feel more ‘back to normal’…if there is such a thing as normal anymore. I am truly grateful to still be alive and well! xx

    • feelingpaint says:

      Oh no… I am sorry to hear that 😥 Cancer is hard to digest for others and even more difficult when it’s your own. I don’t know why it happens but I suppose knowing why still wouldn’t change the outcome. I will pray for you! Both of my parents have inoperable cancer…so I understand a few parts of the journey. Their approach to the journey is very surprising.

  3. So sorry to hear that both your parents have this terrible disease. You say their approach is surprising…how are they coping? My own attitude at the moment is that I know what I’ve been through so far, I know the unpredictability of the condition, but I don’t want to include it in my life until, and if I have to again. So I have to manage my thought process carefully, otherwise I end up in panic, deep anxiety and depression.

    Sounds like you’ve a lot on your plate at the moment also. My prayers are sent to you and all others who are facing this trauma, hoping that one day the cause of cancer will be obliterated. I hope you keep painting, I love seeing your work xxxx

    • feelingpaint says:

      You are so very sweet. They are both quite positive, and looking for the things they are thankful for, namely every day. I logged in today because I was inspired to write a post about it. They amaze me.

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